Karmic-Dragonfly

Sunday...

2009-12-27T21:41:17Z

A couple of guys in town had a holiday open house today...so C and I went to brunch first at Zeus Gallery Cafe. Then, we headed over to the open house.

I always like to see people's houses and talk to people that I don't know!

Glad we went -- saw a few people there I recognized, and it's just nice to go to all the parties and gatherings that happen at this time of year.

I've been buying the ingredients today to make pie -- I have a few friends coming over Tuesday -- I didn't do the tree trimming this year, but I wanted to do something for the holidays!

Here's a Youtube from Dan Savage --

Christmas Pics

2009-12-27T07:22:06Z

Few pictures from Christmas --

Christmas Eve Dinner

2009-12-25T05:47:33Z

Had a dinner date with C tonight. We had planned on starting at the Jefferson for drinks, then going to another restaurant. But the other place was closed for Christmas Eve. So, I started calling our other favorites -- they were also all closed!

So, we ate at the bar at the Jefferson and had a good time. Talked to a woman who was in RVA for a few days. Drank too many martinis :) Afterwards back at his place, we spent some much needed "close time" together, and we also talked about where we are emotionally, as far as expectations about a relationship. It was just so damned nice to have an adult conversation about that. He's still rebounding from his ex...so not ready to jump right in. And I'm just enjoying dating!

Interestingly enough, we ran into O and his boyfriend and mom...so I introduced C.

Update

I originally had posted a cute pic of C and me from last night...but I have (temporarily) removed it. The reason is because last night I remember he and I having a discussion about how private he likes to be, and his concerns about Facebook.

He's a relatively new Facebook user and does not even have a profile pic -- I think because of privacy concerns. So, of course, what do I do but bounce home and post his picture on my very public journal, lol!

So, I decided I should ask him before I post a pic here. If you're a Facebook friend, then you can see the pic on there. Otherwise, I won't post a pic here until I find out how comfortable C is with that.

What "you think you are"

2009-12-24T07:15:57Z

My parents called last night, after receiving my letter. It was not quite the reconciliation I might have hoped for. I can't say that I was surprised.

I'll start by saying that I feel sorry for my parents. It was obvious from the pain in their voices that they really don't know how to deal with this situation.

What was truly strange was that the conversation was oddly like a "coming out" conversation. I was taken aback by how the conversation went.

I originally told them I was gay back in the early 90s (91 or '92ish). And given that my family is pretty emotional, that meant that there were some ugly conversations back then. But I thought that at least it was done -- you should have to do that only once.

But tonight...I'm thinking that it's as if the earlier conversations didn't take.

During the mid-90s I dated my first partner, Matt. My parents never met him (although my Mom and sister did visit him briefly when he was in the hospital the last time -- but only caught a glimpse of him as he was being taken for a test). That's because he was ill, and there was still ugliness between my parents and me, so I was not willing to put Matt in that situation.

Since then I have not hidden my sexuality from them. I've spoken about dating guys. Once, my father asked me what the rainbow flag on my car window was, and I told him that it was a gay pride flag. So, although there wasn't a lot of discussion about my sexuality, I didn't hide.

Things came to head again in Nov of 2008 when I wanted to introduce O to the family.

Tonight on the phone, my Dad was pleading with me to explain how I expected them to accept "what you think you are" (his words), when they have been taught all their lives that it is wrong. He also did a fair amount of painful wondering what he did or didn't do as I was growing up to cause this.

Yep, just like a coming out conversation! I was as gentle with them as I could be, explaining (again) that this had nothing to do with them, and that there were a lot of gay people in the world.

My Mom's tack was to talk religion -- I felt like she was using her "magic words" on me (every religion has magic words, right?), like some sort of spell that would make me change. Her talk of the Bible might as well have been talk of voodoo, for all it meant to me.

She talked about "God's Blueprint" -- which was an odd choice of words. Sounds to me like something that she got from some televangelist or something.

Yep, just like a coming out conversation! I mostly listened during that, having nothing to add and not being particularly interested in that.

Now, something new did crop up in the conversation. For sure, I didn't ask about this subject, but it turns out that they also don't believe that different races should marry. Something about God's instruction to the Israelites or something. They were quick to point out that they treat everyone they meet respectfully regardless of race (and I agree with them that that is true), but that they just don't think it is right for different races to marry.

I have to say that that particular twist was NOT part of my original coming out conversation. That one was new to me.

My Dad mentioned my Mom's upcoming surgery, and that he didn't appreciate me adding stress to her now. I apologized -- told him that, for me, the "not talking" was what was stressful, and that I had thought that reconciling would have been a good thing.

I told them that I was not angry anymore, and that I was sorry for not having returned their calls. And I told them that I meant what I had said in the letter - that I would not ignore them in the future.

They told me that I could always come home (just me, not anyone else!) if I wanted. I told them that I appreciated that.

So, there you have it! I feel much better, actually. After my anger was spent a while back, I really didn't like the break between us. So, my calling a couple of weeks ago, and then this letter makes me feel like I at least tried to initiate a reconciliation.

Game Change

2009-12-23T18:44:30Z

I have not been posting lately...because, well, nothing much has been going on, lol! After the last post, I didn't do too much because of the snow -- RVA is not the sort of place to be driving around in the snow, really.

Today is the last day of the work week for me, and we have a 3 day week next week as well. I am "working" at home now -- I have the work laptop beside me, VPNed into the company network...but there are very few work activities going on right now. I can count on 2 hands the total e-mails I have gotten today.

Holiday Plans

C and I have a date for Christmas Eve -- I'm looking forward to it. We've been chatting nearly every night since our last date, and a Christmas Eve date should be fun.

Later in the weekend, I am going to my sister's place for a family gathering.

Game Change

As is my wont here, I bare way too much information, so here goes. I've been talking a good game about helping my Mom be successful with me again...so I decided it was time to walk the walk.

So, I called my parents a couple weekends ago. I wasn't terribly prepared, and they were not there, so I left a rambling message.

I have been told by my sister that they returned the call, although they did not leave a return message. So, I have not talked to them or received a message from them.

Then, a game changing event happened. Mom found out that she needs to have open heart surgery. It's not unusual in my family -- all (and I do mean ALL) of my older relatives have had the procedure. I was hoping that at least one of my older relatives (meaning my Mom) would escape having to go through that.

Anyways, I don't want our relationship to be a burden during a difficult operation like that. And her other health issues mean that the procedure is more dangerous.

So, after I got no return call from them to my call, I penned and mailed a letter last night -- I'm not sure if I am adding to the burden or not.

What I'm trying to do is to break the logjam. Maybe I should have been more conciliatory? I came out to them 17 years ago, but I find myself repeating some themes from then in this letter.

Dear Mom,

I do not like how thing stand right now. I miss our family events. But I also do not know how to fix this.

The fact is – I have always & will always fall in love with men. This will never change. Your rejection of my partners will only keep you and me separated – it will not accomplish anything else. I’m assuming that you would not go anywhere that Dad was not welcome – so why would you expect me to betray my love for my partner by coming to your house where he is not welcome?

I was so ANGRY with you in November of 2008 that I could barely speak to you. As long as O was with me, he provided me love & support whenever I talked to you – he was my safety valve for my anger, so I could keep talking to you. When he and I broke up, I didn’t have that safety valve anymore, so I stopped talking.

I’m not angry anymore, but I won’t go somewhere where my partners are not welcome.

I’m sorry that I have not spoken to you. I know that hurt. I think that an apology is worthless unless there is a change in action – so my change in action is that I will not ignore your voicemail anymore.

I hope that you have a good holiday. C and I have a dinner date on Christmas Eve. I’ll see you at J and R's this weekend.

Snow Day!

2009-12-20T13:01:58Z

So, the snow arrived Friday evening. It's VERY unusual to have a snow in December. I think I got like 8 or 9 inches -- a F/B friend in Charlottesville said that they got 30 inches!

Yesterday, I wanted to build a snowman, so a friend in the neighborhood whom I met just a few weeks ago at one of the After Thanksgiving Parties went out with me.

Turns out that the snow was too dry to stick, so this new friend and I walked around for quite a long time, then came back to my place for wine. It was good to get to meet him -- hear about him and his partner, and good to find out that he and I have a lot of common interests-- we have a lot of the same DVDs, books, etc. And we both speak to trees sometimes, lol!

I also spent some time wrapping presents and making pumpkin bread.

All in all, a very enjoyable afternoon!

I didn't find anything I wanted to take a picture of yesterday, so here's a sunrise pic taken from my back door this morning.

On tap today is to get some more wrapping done...maybe get a room or two cleaned...and then get out of the house!

Friday Eye Candy

2009-12-18T12:14:22Z

Good Date

2009-12-17T12:39:42Z

The date with C went really well last night...conversation (and wine) flowed, lol! Discussion of why previous relationships ended. Tasting of each other's food. Hand holding on the way home in the car. Text messages after we both were back at our respective houses.

Saw a couple of friends who were just finishing as we were arriving. They thought they had missed me, based on the timing of my Facebook entry that I was heading out to the restaurant. But I told them, that I sometimes just post what I'm going to be doing...but it might be a while before I actually get there!

And saw the friend who leads ROSMY -- he was "supposed" to be tending bar -- which was the fund raising gimmick for the evening -- this friend doesn't drink, but would be tending bar.

But most of the time he was walking around working the people at the tables -- so he was schmoozing and doing what he was exactly supposed to be doing, right? He was wearing this humongous, smock-like t-shirt and carrying around a sharpie for people to sign -- as his souvenir of the evening. So, he walks up, we hug, and he hands me the sharpie, and presents his (enviously skinny) belly for me to sign, lol!

Sunrise has been pretty the last couple of days. Not the best picture, but here's what I got, just sticking the camera out of the upstairs window this morning.

Tonight, heading out to a friend's house for dinner and to help her with her Christmas tree.

Wednesday Stuff

2009-12-16T22:16:40Z

I had seen this not-safe-for-work commercial on Youtube a while back...and I tried to find it to send it to a friend, but totally couldn't figure out the right search terms in YouTube --

.

C and I are going to Mosaic tonight to eat dinner -- it's a fundraising event for ROSMY. I'm looking forward to it -- we've been texting / messaging nearly each night since we saw each other last week...so it'll be good to actually see each other and hear a real voice and feel real touch!

Monday

2009-12-14T23:59:09Z

House Tour

I enjoyed walking around the Churchill house tour yesterday. It was POURING at times and cold...every house had surgical booties that you had to put on before you could walk around. I was wearing some waterproof boot/sneaker type shoes -- I had a hard time getting the booties on at each house.

So, it was pretty crazy to go. But it was fun, in a child-like way -- sort of like puddle jumping! And I had fun talking to the friend who went with me!

There was one great contemporary (on the inside) house -- the place had a gorgeous view of the Thames...I mean, the James. The back room had wonderful windows of course. The kitchen was in the middle parlor room, while the front room was more in keeping with the age of the house.

You could stand in the front room, and look all the way through the kitchen to the back room and on to the river.

There was also a house by a guy whose name I knew through mutual friends. And he had done a fantastic job with his 1855 house -- his taste was so eclectic -- lots of 1950s memorabilia in this 150 year old house! So, I did the Facebook thing with him today.

One house though..I think they had gone down the wrong path -- made some disagreeable decisions -- like putting in odd molding that didn't go with the house. And it also looked like they had done all their shopping at one particular store -- the rooms looked sort of like a showroom.

Afterwards, we came back to the friend's house where his wife (who had sensibly not gone out in the rain) had apple pie and warm cider waiting. It was very nice!

My Neighborhood's December Gathering

The historic district Christmas party was only lightly attended last night. But I had fun anyway -- the wine may have contributed to that, lol! Boy, did I partake...

Last of the shopping

I went out tonight and did the last of my shopping by buying ornaments for a couple friends. Of course, you know my rule, right? "One for you, one for me!" So I bought myself a new ornament tonight too!

My So Called Holidays

2009-12-13T13:41:46Z

Scrooge

Quick update ... friend and I went to see Scooge in Rouge last night. It's a Richmond Triangle Players production, shown at the Empire because RTP's new space is not ready yet.

It was a pleasant enough diversion -- think Dickens "Vaudeville Christmas Carol" -- replete with puns, sexual innuendo, speaking directly to the audience, drag, a bit of slapstick...

I am an acquaintance of one of the cast members (there were only 3 cast members, each playing multiple roles), and the acquaintance did a great job, so I stopped and told him so in the lobby after the play.

More Christmas-y Activities

Today, heading over to Churchill for the Christmas house tour with some friends who live there. It's going to be a cold and rainy day to be walking from house to house! But warm company will counteract the rain!

After that, my own historic district has its Christmas meeting today, so I made a pecan pie yesterday to take with me to that. And of course, I will bring a bottle of wine -- that's sort of the deal for our meetings -- food and wine, lol!

I also need to make a run to Costco to get a couple of wreaths. I think I'm going to go first thing this morning in an effort to avoid the worst of the crowds!

Dating

There was some less-than-ideal interaction between C and me these past few days. It was nothing major -- just figuring out how to interact with each other. I made an outburst to Facebook about it ("Sometimes Dating Sucks") -- He didn't appreciate that, lol, which I can understand, so I deleted that status update.

He's sick in bed right now, so we haven't been able to talk. What I realized during this is -- I don't know one way or the other whether C and I are really compatible emotionally -- dating is an interview process after all, right? It is also a process of being flexible and fitting into each other.

But one thing I did realize this weekend is that I like being in a dating situation right now -- I like it very much. Remember my friend K who cussed me last year? I have been thinking lately, and I realized that she and I had relied on each other for social activities too much for too long -- years!

And I think I let my love life go for so long (and ended up dating O off and on for so long) because it was too easy to fall back on K. Not having K in my life has pushed me to pay attention to a part of my life that I had neglected.

Family

Found out something that bothered me to hear.

Years ago, I had given Christmas stoneware dishes to my Mom -- and she always used these to decorate the dining room table for the holidays.

I found out from my youngest sister that my mom did not bring out the dishes this year, because it depressed her -- my Mom didn't want the dishes to remind her of how things are between her and me right now.

As I get older, I realize that my parents are not really the adults in the family -- I think I have to play the role of the adult. So, I guess I need to call her, just to open up the lines of communication again.

Friday Eye Candy

2009-12-11T12:09:35Z

Home Sick, Date, Tree

2009-12-10T18:28:59Z

So, I came home early from work yesterday -- I did not feel well! I think I caught the cold that C had -- the symptoms are the same -- a cold that just makes you feel lousy -- no other symptoms!

So, I rested...and by the evening, I felt better, so went out to dinner with him. I had never been to Avalon -- it was good -- the brussel sprouts were excellent! We ended the date with a chaste kiss -- I wasn't feeling well enough for anything else, and he had work to do!

I'm back at work today but still dragging.

Because I'm not having my tree trimming party this year, I went ahead and got the tree decorated this week. Here are the results --

I'm thinking that my tree looks pretty much the same each year, so I may have to change things up next year.

Browser Junkie

2009-12-09T13:07:58Z

I think I may be a browser junkie...Right now, I'm using the new Mac beta of Google's Chrome to post this.

Downloading Chrome means I now have 6, count 'em 6, browsers on my machine: Camino (my default), Firefox, Safari, Opera, Chrome, and Internet Explorer (not on the Mac, but running under my virtual Windows instance) -- and that doesn't count the duplicates like Firefox and Opera that are also running under my Windows instance!

Chrome is interesting. It's pretty enough. I like the way the new tabs "grow" upwards out of the window.

And I like how the tabs are at the top, except for the menu and the 3 little balls (red, yellow, green) -- I know what they do, but I have no clue what to call those balls, lol!.

And I like how creating a new tab shows you your most used sites --

The other interesting thing is that each tab in Chrome runs as its own process -- so if you have a site hang up, it just hangs that tab, not the whole browser. That also means that Chrome uses more memory than other browsers (there's always a price, right?), but I have 4Gb on the Mac, so I don't worry about stuff like that so much.

The address bar and the search bar are the same in Chrome -- which probably matches how the average user uses the address bar. It's good, but I don't like it as well as Firefox's "Awesome" bar though -- the FF address bar is totally better -- I like FF's implementation better.

Other Stuff

Heading out to dinner with C tonight...Looking forward to it!

And my basement is wet AGAIN -- what is UP with all the rain in the last couple months...Usually, the basement only gets wet from a hurricane -- it's been wet (and stinky) like 3 or 4 times in the last 2 months!

Dinner @ Black Sheep Tonight

2009-12-09T02:23:33Z

Dinner @ The Black Sheep tonight with one out-of-town and other in-town friends. I had never been. I liked the place -- the "Ara Burger" (I think that's what they called it) -- lentil based -- good, except I didn't like the horseradishy/pickly stuff they put on it. The hard cider was good.

Oddly enough, in the bathroom, there was this little mirror at waist-level. So, I got a good view, of well, me, lol! I decided that the mirror may have been there so that women could check out their makeup whilst sitting...otherwise, I got no idea...

Funny...while we were eating, a cute guy came in, and our eyes locked -- for a good, long while, right? -- pleasant enough when that happens, but one of the friends sitting next to me at the table asked if I wanted her to just get up, so the guy could sit down with me -- evidently, she thought he was cute too, but had noticed that he was staring at me, and me at him, lol!

There was a male-female couple who also came in while we were there. I watched them for a long while. She was considerably older than he. I found myself wondering if it was mother-son or May-December.

Mellow Weekend

2009-12-06T16:38:14Z

Seasonal Activities

Yesterday was a cold rainy day, so I spent time addressing Christmas cards and doing laundry.

Then, last evening, I went over to help a friend get his tree out of the basement (and "fluff" it), so I turned on my iPhone for music -- I don't usually work in silence.

So, the friend suggested that he turn on his stereo instead and picked a pop station. Eventually, he said he couldn't stand that any longer and said he was going to turn on some "real queer music." I was like, "Madonna?" But he turned on the il re pastore aria, lol!

The same friend is coming over soon to help me get my tree today...I've got all the stuff -- gloves, bow-saw, tape measure, tree stand, etc. -- ready to go. We always just walk down to the Jaycees lot on the corner and carry the tree back here. The hardest part is getting it to stand stably in the stand.

I'm not having my tree trimming party this year. This year has been so transitional for me -- I don't know how to explain where I am right now personally, except to say that I'm keeping a low profile...I do intend to have friends over at some point during the season...I think for pie, lol! Just not the full tree trimming party -- it's just not the right year for me to do the full party!

Dating Activities

Even though our date the night before was cancelled, C and I saw each other later this week and spent a lot of pillow talk time -- he's finally letting down some of his barriers -- which is really important to me. I have to have personal details about a person or I lose interest fast.

Other Stuff

My boss told me about a funny situation from where she used to work -- evidently, there was a guy who was very frank and said what he thought...and if he got an ugly e-mail (the way we all do sometimes), he sometimes would send this response: "Fuck you. Strong e-mail to follow...." LOL! Now, I have trouble believing that he really sent such e-mails -- exaggeration adds spice to a story, right?

What brought this up was that I got a snitty little e-mail from one of my customers, addressed to me. Now, I like to be as polite as I can at work, but I figure, if you can't say something with everyone in the room, then you can't say shit directly to me like that...

So I answered his actual question in the e-mail very professionally, while copying my boss and his boss...

Tweeting

The editor of the blog, Jane Austen's World tweeted a link that I found interesting --> http://radar.oreilly.com/2009/11/what-would-jane-austen-have-tw.html. Evidently, mail arrived several times each day in London during Jane Austen's time. So, technically, with all the (snail)mail she generated, she was basically tweeting her ass off, lol!

This article led me to another article about how a school TWEETED the Battle of Gettysburg over a two month period! http://www.twhistory.com/

Style Article on Union Hill

2009-12-06T02:01:18Z

I found this article interesting. The guy fighting the Union Hill historic district is right, of course -- gentrification WILL force out long term residents.

It sounds, though, like gentrification is already happening in Union Hill -- the historic district designation would just speed that up, I think.

My house is located in a city old and historic district, but the district was never a poor area -- nobody was forced out by the designation of the historic district. In actuality, the district was formed to prevent a local organization from tearing down one of the old Victorians on the street.

I don't know what the answer is to these sorts of situations -- poor neighborhoods often have houses which just sit and rot for lack of money to keep them up. For example, there's what could be a beautiful Queen Anne over on Laburnum and (I think) Hawthorne (or maybe Noble) that I have watched become more and more decrepit over the years. And you don't want the old houses to fall down -- they are pretty irreplaceable!

In this quote below, I wish the author had kept the "units" the same -- they switched from numbers of black residents to numbers of white families...but let's say that each white family has 3 members, then it is 4,000 black residents and 300 white residents.

The more than 4,000 mostly black residents of the neighborhood who, according to census data, have an average annual income of less than $15,000, aren’t likely to thrive under restrictive neighborhood covenants that serve to please fewer than 100 white families, Corbett says. Those recently transplanted white families have eyes toward the neighborhood’s inevitable gentrification, he contends.

http://www.styleweekly.com/ME2/Audiences/dirmod.asp?sid=&nm=&type=Publishing&mod=Publications::Article&mid=8F3A7027421841978F18BE895F87F791&tier=4&id=C965B8830ACC413F8A64A2BB4799BE92&AudID=20938C672A3049EEB0CF33069AEE1AE0

Friday Eye Candy

2009-12-05T01:35:47Z

Lewis Ginter Christmas Lights

2009-12-04T04:37:46Z

Friend and I went to Lewis Ginter tonight to see the lights. Remember how I helped hang some of the lights, so I figured I should go! And it was a member night, so we got in for free.

They moved some of the butterflies that we got up on the ladder to hang!

My hands were totally weak from lifting the lemon tree earlier, so I got precious few clear shots! I guess I just couldn't hold the camera steady enough for night shots!

But here are a few of them --

The new bridge, just recently opened --

The friend I went with --

The Lemon Tree is in Da House...

2009-12-03T22:56:16Z

Lemon Tree

It's supposed to get well below freezing here this week for the first time this season, so I had to get my Grandmother's lemon tree into the house. The tree always gets too big for the house, so I lop it off every year before I bring it in.

But I waited too late to chop it this year, so it has only had time to put out some small leaves on top instead of the fully formed leaves that it usually would have.

Damn if it wasn't HEAVY THIS YEAR! We just got a lot of rain yesterday. I can already tell that my back muscles will be a bit sore tomorrow! At least I didn't get any thorn cuts this year -- I felt one thorn hit my cheek, but it didn't draw any blood.

Batting Zero My Hero

I am batting ZERO this week! My date last night was cancelled due to a family emergency. C did exactly what he was supposed to do -- called to cancel, explained, apologized, asked for raincheck, sent a text message after the fact to apologize again -- so he did what he was supposed to. But I was still disappointed. I had been looking forward to pleasant company (and truth be told, I was really looking forward to afterwards! Stop judging me, lol!)...

Tonight, I was supposed to go to a play, but the performance was cancelled due to injury! So, that friend is coming over so that we can pop a bottle of sparkling, while we plan which performance we will go to.

Squareup

2009-12-03T01:18:14Z

This is sort of interesting to me. There are already iPhone apps that let you take a credit card (by inputting the number), but this is a device that plugs into the headphone jack and let's you swipe a credit card.

The other thing that is REALLY nice is that it allows you to accept a credit card without signing up with a processing vendor. I'm not sure how that works -- usually a merchant has to sign up for a service that handles the transactions.

Pricing is not available yet, since it's in trial. Since it doesn't require a monthly fee, I'm assuming the pricing will be per transaction, but I'm not sure.

The way it works, I think if you owed me a few bucks, then I could swipe your card, and you could pay me that way -- so one step closer to all electronic money -- where your phone becomes how you pay for things, right?

It's coming to Blackberries too.

Start accepting payment cards immediately with Square. No contracts, monthly fees, or hidden costs.
....
As a payer, get your receipts sent to your email or mobile phone instantly and access them securely online. You can also use a text message to authorize every payment in real-time

http://squareup.com/

Latest Great Nephew!

2009-12-01T22:47:09Z

I've already posted this on Facebook, but here it is for K-D.

My second great-nephew was born today. Here's a pic, fresh outta the oven --

Some pictures I took when I went over to the hospital tonight --

Uncomfortable Exam

2009-12-01T22:27:34Z

Lawd, the trials and tribulations of a gay man...

First off, this post is about a medical issue, so you might want to bail out now if you don't like medical topics...

Secondly, I'll skip directly to the punch line -- I'm fine, no medical issue here.

This post is about how uncomfortable examinations can be.

Here's the deal...for a long time now I've had a minor itch in a private area...and sometimes in the shower, I could feel a very small lump there.

So, you know where this is going, right?

The thought crossed my mind that I might have a wart there. The only problem is that I could not SEE anything if I examined myself in the mirror.

Until 2 weeks ago....

I had gone on a long bike ride and gotten chafed (I still haven't broken down and bought padded shorts), and when I got out of the shower, I could see a couple of red dots -- right where I had the itch, right where I could feel the lump.

So, that's when I made an appointment with my family doctor. My family doctor is a man that I've been going to for about 15 years. The only problem is that my familiar, male family doctor is out of the office for an extended period, so the office is now staffed by several unfamiliar-to-me, female doctors.

Although I was uncomfortable, I was basically okay with the idea of having a female doctor examine me -- she's an M.D., so it is what it is...

So, the doctor walks in, I tell her the story, and then she tells me this -- whenever a female doctor has a man drop his pants, she has to ask the office nurse come in as sort of a witness!

Um....okaaay...huh....that makes me more uncomfortable. I've known the nurse for as long as I've known my family doctor, lol!

So, I ask point blank -- does she have to have a witness, when I'm a gay man? I mean, it's not like any sexual issue will develop, right? She says yes, blame the lawyers.

I made a disgusted noise, and said okay, that this was a medical issue, so go.

So, the nurse comes in, I drop my drawers, bend over, and the doctor examines me. She could see the lump that I was feeling, but it was not a wart -- not an issue at all -- just how some skin had grown back together. And I guess the bike ride chafing made the skin visible to me.

So, I'm glad I went because it set my mind at ease. The women reading this are all probably saying "try being up in stirrups once a year"...I know, I know...but women have to learn to deal with private exams very early in life -- men don't start having them until later in life. My family doctor told me once that he had men in their 50s who would not come in for a physical because they didn't want the routine prostate exam. I told him that that was ridiculous -- it's a medical procedure, fercryingoutloud.

I also mentioned to the doc that I was really glad about how this turned out, because I wasn't going to have to tell my ex about this -- I mean, if it had turned out differently, I would have felt like I should tell him, not to mention C.

Google Translate

2009-11-30T23:23:30Z

I used Google Translate to translate K-D today, just for kicks. The French is not too bad...there's some good French in there (although there's some funky stuff too), but most of it would be understandable by someone who didn't speak English.

I'm surprised that the translator automatically made me feminine (végétarienne). What's up with that?

The translator didn't seem to know what to do with the word "ride." It left "ride" alone in the title, but used un tour in the body of the e-mail.

I would have thought about using un trajet, as in a "route," but un tour à vélo is probably ok, but I don't really know. (I notice that it used un trajet a few words after that.)

It totally screwed up a few words later, and mentioned something about riding a horse, lol -- monter à cheval.

Ride Today...and Christmas Lights...etc.

2009-11-29T22:45:21Z

Ride Today

I went on a bike ride with the local bike association today. It was just shy of 36 miles, which is the longest ride I have done. It was in the East End -- mostly flat, although there were some hills in the last part of the ride, and it was windy.

I rode the "B pace" ride, which at first was PERFECT for me -- exactly the speed I wanted to ride. B rides are supposed to be 14 - 16 mph, although I think that we were going faster than that at first.

After 20 miles, we stopped at a store for bathroom break, water, etc. Then, we got back on the ride -- and someone quickened the pace! Lawd, I think they were going the B+ pace -- which was totally not what I wanted at that point in the ride! At one point, we were going up hill and I looked at my speedometer -- just to keep up, I was going 18 mph -- which is fast for me going up hill! Down the other side of the hill, I hit 25 mph -- again, I was just keeping up!

So, another guy and I paired up and finished the race together, leaving the "A-wannabees" to fly away by their damned selves, lol!

Christmas Lights

I got the lights on the hedges yesterday. I tried a new color this year -- purple. But when I lit them, they sort of looked fuchsia. I was afraid that it would look a bit "ghetto," but I think the fuchsia, white and blue do pretty well together!

Garnett's Again

A couple friends and I went to Garnett's again for dinner last night. This time, instead of the "WBLT" (white bean lettuce and tomato), I had a grilled cheese with hot mustard and red onions on rye. It was pretty tasty!

Afterwards, we watched a movie. It was a totally forgettable movie -- I don't even remember the name. It had Ben Affleck in it, but um, I was bored and was texting C during the movie to see if we were still going on our date today...which we did not. He asked to postpone it until later this week, since he is just getting over a bad head cold that he's had for like 10 days now!

New Theme

As you can see, I've changed the theme here at Chez Dragonfly...I was tired of the blue. It's a bit of work to change the theme, because I always overwrite some of the CSS, so that it suits me. And I have to figure out what the class and ID names are in the new theme in order to overwrite. I've been in an orange, red and gray mood for a while, so I think this theme will be around for a few months at least!